101 Tales of James and Lily
by Black.And.White.Converse
Summary: 101 oneshots about James and Lily. From 1st year to their death.
1. Maybe

_**Disclaimer – **__**She owns nothing. Yeah. (N)**_

**_AN - 101 oneshots about my new favourite ship, James and Lily. They're all floating around in my head and blocking my brain and then I forget them. So I'm sharing them with you. If you want to read them? I know I shouldn't be starting another story. I'm useless, I know. But TECHNICALLY this isn't an ACTUAL story, so it doesn't count, right? No? Hmm... )_**

_Time Set: 7th Year._

It was breakfast. Remus was reading "_Hairy Snout, Human Heart_" with a furrowed brow. Sirius was alternating between scrutinising his appearance in a tablespoon, and shovelling down pancakes as if he hadn't eaten for days. Peter was frantically riffling through pages of a text book in front of him, and scribbling down facts onto a piece of parchment that was his potions essay, which was due in little over 20 minutes. And James, three guesses what James was doing.

"If he bloody touches Evans _one more time_ I swear, to all that is magical, I will stick this fork right up his-"

Gregory Fawcett had just enveloped Lily's hand, which had been lying on the table in front of them, in his, and shot her a charming smile. James, who had been getting increasingly annoyed since Fawcett had wandered over from the Ravenclaw table and began shamelessly flirting with her, growled angrily.

"Right!" James stood up with every intention to assault Fawcett with his cutlery, which he was flourishing dangerously in the air. Sirius and Remus, who were sat either side of James and only half paying attention to his irritated ramble, each grabbed one of his elbows and pulled him back down to the bench. "Hey!" He complained indignantly. "Whose side are you on here?"

"The side where you don't get detention for a week from McGonagall for attacking Fawcett?"

"The side where Evans doesn't refuse to talk to you because you attacked Fawcett?"

"The side where you don't come back here complaining that we didn't stop you doing such an insane thing?"

"The side where the entire Ravenclaw Quidditch team -"

"_No_, you see, there are only two sides here." James snapped. "You're either with me or against me."

He looked at them expectantly. "Against." Remus and Sirius replied together, still not looking up from what they were each doing.

"Peter?" James demanded.

"I agree with Remus." Peter said automatically, also not looking up from this parchment.

"Do you even know what's going on?" James said, huffily.

"Not really. But it's always the safest option to agree with Moony." Peter anwsered, vaguely.

"I'm sorry Wormtail, why is it always Remus? Why am _I_ not the one relied on to –" Sirius was interrupted.

"Because, if it wasn't for you and James persuading me to come to the kitchens with you yesterday, I would have done this homework by now. Slughorn's going to give me detention, and therefore I agree with Remus."

"No one asked for a _speech_, I -"

"He just touched her _again_! What, is he just out of Azkaban or something?" James fumed. "I'm going to show him what- "

"Remus," Peter cut across him, chewing his quill anxiously. "Where is a Bezoar found?"

"Honestly, Slughorn told us this in first year, Peter. You really should pa-"

"In the stomach of a goat. Not that you asked _me_. Always to Moony for the answers…to Moony for the reliance…" Sirius trailed off grumpily.

"Sorry, Pads." Peter said, grinning slightly. "What is it the Pepperup Potion does?"

Sirius, looking rather surprised said "The what-ter up who? How am I supposed to know?"

Peter rolled his eyes and Remus said promptly, "It cures the common cold."

"See, this is why you should go to Remus for the answers." Sirius said, nodding.

"What! But you- and- when I- and you- _argh_!"

"Shut up! Shh!" James flapped his hands frantically as he awkwardly leanined across Remus to try to listen to the conversation Lily and Fawcett were having.

"No, me neither." Lily was saying, laughing.

"Okay, good. So I'll see you later?" Fawcett said, once again smiling in that annoying way.

"Yeah, see you."

"'See you later'. '_See you later'_! What does that mean? Do you think they're doing something later?" James asked hysterically as Fawcett got up and walked away.

"_We_ don't know, Prongs." Remus explained patiently. "We only heard the same amount of the conversa-"

"Yeah but people just say 'see you later' as a goodbye thing. It probably doesn't actually mean '_I __will__ see you later to carry out our previously agreed plans.'_" Sirius interjected wisely.

"Yeah but I- Oh look she's going! Lets go!" James immediately jumped up and began tugged at them to go the same. "Oh, hurry up!"

"What? Why do we have go when _she_ does?" Sirius whined. "_I'm_ not finished eating!"

"Yeah James, don't rush him. He's only had five whole pancakes, four slices of toast, three pieces of bacon, and egg and three glasses of pumpkin juice." Remus listed smirking slightly.

Sirius shot him a withering stare and grabbed another 2 pieces of toast before James dragged him out of his seat. "Hey! All right, all right. I'm coming, I'm coming. Don't get your wand in a knot."

"Come _on_!" James said eagerly, jumping up and down excitedly.

"Oi! Don't push!" Sirius complained, through a mouthful of food, accidentally spraying some crumbs on a third year Hufflepuff girl who was unknowingly walking past. "Oh, sorry." He apologised, spraying even more food onto her hair and robes. Squealing, the girl ran away. Sirius shrugged.

James rushed them all out of the hall, (where they parted with Peter, as he had to hand in his essay to Professor Slughorn) and pulled them up the steps, through a shortcut and they arrived outside charms just a few seconds before Lily, which gave James chance to lean casually against the wall and 'mess up' his hair a bit.

"Hello Ev-" James began pleasantly.

"Good Morning, Remus." Lily said, ignoring James and smiling at Remus.

"Morning, Lily." Remus replied, giving her a small smile and shooting James a guilty look. Remus had always felt quite bad that _he_ was on friendly terms with Lily Evans, even though _James_ was the one obsessing about her _all of the time._

As Lily and Remus started to talk about some recently released book, James, Sirius and Peter tuned out. James took the opportunity to stare at her without shame or interruption. That was, until, Sirius nudged him and asked him if he was drooling.

While there was a pause in conversation between Remus and Lily, James gladly took the opportunity to ask, "Can I sit by you in charms, Evans?"

Sirius snorted at his eagerness and Lily paused. "Ivy Samuels sits there." She responded, faltering slightly.

"But she left." James pointed out immediately.

"Did she?" Lily asked, rather unconvincingly.

"Yes, 3 months ago."

"Well, she might come back."

"If she does, I'll move." He persisted, smiling.

Lily narrowed her eyes at James, and then marched past them, nose in the air, into the charms classroom.

Grinning, James followed her. When he got to the desk, she had already unpacked her quill, ink, parchment, wand and all of her charms related books, and was sat down facing the front. Still smiling, he did the same and sat on the bench beside her.

As Flitwick began to talk about the 'objectives' of the upcoming lesson, James tuned out again and turned to Lily. "Why are you so reluctant so look at me?" He whispered.

"Because," Lily said quietly, not taking her eyes off Flitwick, "You distract me."

It was something about the _way_ Lily said it. _You distract me_ was somehow very different in James' mind to _you're distracting. _"Oh, really?" He smirked.

Her nostrils flared. "I meant," she hissed. "I can't concentrate with you there."

He continued to smirk; she could see it out of the corner of her eye. She finally glared at him with narrowed eyes, not the kind of look he'd been hoping for. "Shut up, Potter. Stop smirking. I mean it. You're so big headed."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am –"

"Miss Evans! Mr Potter! Quiet, please, I am _trying_ to teach here!" Lily went the same colour of her hair. James continued contentedly staring at Lily. "Now everyone, turn to page 173 in your text books and read the entire page. Then answer questions one to eleven at the bottom."

The class fell silent as they all began to read. After a few minutes there was the rustle of people rooting in their bags for quills, ink and parchment.

"Psst."

Lily stiffened and her nostrils flared again. She took a deep breath and ignored James, who evidently just thought she hadn't heard.

"Psst, Evans."

"What?" She hissed through gritted teeth, barely moving her lips,

"You have a spare quill?" He whispered, smiling at her.

She gave him a disapproving look. "How can you possibly come to lessons without a quill?"

"Forgot?" James supplied.

"It's really not good enough, Potter. You're _head boy_. You're _supposed_ to set an _example_."

"Just because I forgot a quill, doesn't mean that I don't set an example. Nobody even notices if you have one or not. Friendly classmates are always willing to lend." He held out his hand pointedly. She ignored it.

"Its not just about the quill. I mean, look at your uniform. Your tie is all askew and your shirts not tucked in-"

"Uniform isn't _that_ important."

"So doing work isn't important, uniform isn't, what is?"

"Hmm…Behaviour?" Big mistake.

"Don't you even get me started on your behaviour."

"Miss Evans! Mr Potter! _Please!_ Save your bickering for _after_ class!" Flitwick snapped.

"Sorry, sir."

"Right."

The room fell silent again. "Moony?"

Remus looked to see if Flitwick was looking, and then whispered, "Yes, James?"

"Do you have a spare quill?"

"Yes, I do."

"…Uh, may I please borrow it?"

"Why don't you have one?"

"Lost it."

"And you only have one?"

"Yes."

"And you _lost it_?"

"Right."

"When?"

"A few days ago, I guess."

"And its only occurring to you _now_ to get one?"

"Yes."

"You're rather slow."

"Thanks, mate." He said sarcastically.

Pulling a quill out of his bag, Remus passed it surreptitiously to James. "Thanks, Moony."

"On Saturday, -"

"What's happening on Saturday?"

"Hogsmeade!"

"Oh yeah!"

"On Saturday you're buying a pack of 20 quills."

"That's an awful waste of money when I can just borrow from you, isn't it?"

"20 quills. I mean it, Prongs."

"Hmph." James turned back around and looked over at Lily who was already finishing question three.

"Evans?"

"What?"

"Who are you going to Hogsmeade with on Saturday?"

She stopped writing. "…Gregory asked me."

"Fawcett?"

"Yes."

"What did you say?"

"I told him that I was already going with someone."

"Who?"

"No one."

"Didn't want to go with him, eh?"

"No."

"Do you want to go with me?"

"_No._"

"Why not?"

"Because, I don't like you."

"Come on, Evans…" He mumbled, putting his arm around her and squeezing her shoulder gently.

She shook him off. "Don't touch me, Potter, we're in a _classroom _for Merlins sake." She hissed.

"So," He tucked a long strand of her red hair behind her ear, at which she instantly stiffened and gave him an untrusting sideways glance, and he leaned forwards to whisper in it. "Does that mean I can touch you outside the classroom?" He whispered as his hand found her knee under the table.

Lily's eyes widened in outrage and she slapped him, with all the force she could muster, across the face.

"Oof! _Ev-ans_!" He groaned, clutching the side of his stinging face in pain.

"You're disgusting, Potter!" She yelled.

"I was only joking!" He wined. "Sort of…"

The 'sort of' earned James another powerful slap on the exact same place.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" She screamed furiously.

"MISS EVANS! MR POTTER! This is the third interruption in less than an hour! DETENTION!" Professor Flitwick roared.

"But-!"

"No excuses, Miss Evans!"

James rolled his eyes and banged his head down on the table. Lily pressed her lips together tightly, finished the set work at top speed and then proceeded to sit with her arms folded stubbornly for over 15 minutes.

When the bell eventually rang and Lily stormed out of the classroom, James rushed after her.

"Evans!"

"YOU LEAVE ME ALONE, POTTER!" She screamed.

"I'm sorry about the-"

"You're _SORRY_? I haven't gotten a detention in over six years! Not _one_ in the _entire_ time I've been at Hogwarts! And I sit by _YOU_ and half and hour later-"

"Well you did slap him. Twice." Sirius pointed out, having just arrived with Remus, Peter, Alice and Emmeline.

"He was feeling my leg under the table!" She shrieked. Sirius smirked appreciatively at James, who grinned cockily.

"I'd wipe that smile off your face if I were you, Pads, unless you want her to slap you too." Remus interjected wisely, as Sirius suppressed his smirk with difficulty.

Lily screamed in frustration and bellowed lividly "I_ HATE_ you, James Potter!" Before dashing down the corridor. Alice and Emmeline gave James identical scathing glares before running off after Lily.

"Oh, good going, Prongs." Remus said sarcastically, but James barely heard him; he was wondering what it was about Lily Evans that made him act like that.

He hadn't meant to act like such a pervert. He hadn't meant to come across so obnoxious. But there was something about Lily that made James act like someone that he wasn't, and he wished more than anything that he could just be himself around her.

_Maybe then he'd stand a chance._

* * *

Authors Note/Alison's Note_ [[...haaaha. sorry. I enjoy to laugh at my own simpleness. (Y)_

Hmm...Tried my best...Sorry for any mistakes.  
I think Flitwick was rather out of character, but he was having an impatient day.  
**Review? Please:)**  
Honest responses are much appreciated.  
But no flames, please...because I wouldn't flame you and they actually quite upset me.  
Remember, there is a difference between just being horrible and giving 'constructive critisism'.  
Eesh that sounded patronizing...sorry.  
Constructive critisism is appreciated too.  
This is my first one shot. )

_**1/101.**_


	2. Puddles

_**AN.**_ 2nd. Yup. Yup. Enjoy and stuff. :). This came into my head when, surprisingly enough, it had been raining. And my friends and I were running through the puddles. It's fun. You should do it. Although not before school/work/something where you are expected to look respectable. Big mistake. Lesson learnt. [Slight part based on real life.  
Quite a short chapter. Sorry.  
Review replies BELOOOOOW.

_**Disclaimer:**_ JKR owns Harry Potter & co. I own your face. :)

_Puddles._

_7__th__ Year_

It was a cold, grey day in late November. Lily Evans and James Potter were walking across the empty courtyard holding hands. The ground around them was filled with puddles and the trees were bare.

It had been just over one week since Lily had finally agreed to go out with James, and his attitude seemed to have changed quite dramatically since then. He would pull out chairs and open doors. He would pretend that he was sincerely interested in the things that Lily wanted to talk about and he would make sure he would pay attention in the classes that they were in together. He had stopped making stupid joke and sexual innuendoes and on their last trip to Hogsmeade, James had spent over three hours in _Flourish and Blotts _with Lily without one word of complaint, even though Lily could tell how incredibly bored he was. He seemed to be determined to be the 'perfect boyfriend'. Determined not to annoy Lily in any way. This, of course, irritated her immensely.

Although this new James was pretty damn unfaultable, Lily missed the old one. The James who would spend hours and hours in the Quidditch shop, admiring the latest broomstick and play practical jokes every other day. The James who would follow her around shouting corny pick-up lines. The James who would continuously ask her to marry him at the most inappropriate times. The James who would ramble for ages about Quidditch, bragging about his latest score/save/catch, boasting about Gryffindor's latest win. The James who would skip in circles around her as she rushed to lessons, asking pointless questions like "What are you're views on contact lenses?" The James who would run around whatever table Lily was doing her homework at, singing 'Lily's-studying' songs. This was the James that she has agreed to go out with. This was the James that she was falling in love with.

She desperately wanted him to realise that he didn't need him to be perfect. That he could relax around her. That he could really be himself while he was with her. That she loved HIM, just as he is. Annoying quirks and all.

However, she didn't know how to say it. She couldn't exactly say 'Stop it! You're being too perfect!' He was making all these changes for _her._ He was trying to be different because he thought that it was what would make _her _happy. Idiot. He was treading on egg shells and it was annoying her.

"You okay, Lils?" He asked concernedly, snapping her away from her thoughts.

"Oh, yeah." She responded casually.

"You're quiet…" He said.

"I…I'm thinking." She said distantly.

"About what?" He said, stopping and turning towards her.

"You." She answered, smiling and wrapping her arms around his neck.

He grinned, wrapping his arms around her waist. "Really?"

"Yeah." She laughed.

He looked deeply into her eyes, and as much as it killed her to admit it because she did _NOT_ want to be one of those girls, it made her go weak. "I…I love you, Lily."

"I know." She said, grinning. Regaining her strength she lifted her foot and kicked down hard on the ground between them, causing freezing cold, muddy water to splash the side of James' trousers.

"EVANS!" He squeaked, his voice raising a few octaves as the water soaked through to his skin.

She smirked, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Yes?"

"What's wrong with -? Why would you -? You're going to pay for that!"

She threw her head back and laughed. James stomped in the puddle they were stood in and water shot up her Lily's legs, soaking her socks and skirt and pants. "JAMES POTTER!" She screamed. He cackled. "My knickers are wet!" She hissed, clamping her legs together and standing awkwardly.

James' eyebrows shot up. "That's not _exactly_ the context I imagined you screaming my name and saying _that,_ but I'll take it." Lily flushed, but James wasn't sure if it was from anger or because she realised what she had said.

"I'm going to kill you!" She yelled launching herself at him.

He ran.

\\\\\\\

By the time they skidded into their Transfiguration they were 7 and a half minutes late and drenched from head to toe. The class fell silent and turned to stare at them standing in the doorway. Minivera McGonagall peered at them curiously over the top of her glasses, eyebrows raised.

James cleared his throat. "Ahem. Sorry we're late, Professor." He said in his best attempt at apologetic tones, but his voice shaking slightly with the strain of not laughing.

Lily pressed her lips together, looking at the ground and biting on the inside of her cheek, the corners of her mouth turning upwards slightly.

"Would either of you care to tell me why you're several minutes late? And making puddles on my floor?"

_**AN**_ – Hmm. Too short. Too short. And the ending was crappy. Oh well. Tell me what you think. :-)**  
The whole knickers thing came was quoted exactly from a conversation between me and my dear friend Jack. The perverted bastard. :-)**  
_**SilverDrama**_ – Thanks. Thanks. Thanks. Hope you continue reading my tale of their tail… :-)

_**SiriusLover**_ – Mmm. Sorry 'bout that. Thanks. :-)

_**Bre**_ – Thank you very much. That's a really high complement. :-) I hope you carry on reading, although you might not because you don't have an account and stuff…

_**Bookworm1232**_ – I replied to you before…but thanks again. :-) No I don't like people 'yelling at me' but I do appreciate any constructive criticism. And I'm glad you liked it. But, again, its not my FIRST Fanfic, it was my first one shot.

_**SeRa.RoCkS**_– Thanks. Yeah, they're all one shots. Although I did want to write a story. Which I shall. LilySeverus probably. :-)

Review and make my sad little _almost-time-to-go-back-to-school_ day.

And for those fickle ones, I'll give you stuff. Like…cookies seem to be popular. And y'know…cheese seems to be selling well. But some people are lactose intolerant so I guess I'll pick something else…a book everybody likes a good book. In fact, if you review, I'll turn INTO J K Rowling and write one fantastic Marauders-and-Lily-filled book. Deal? Eh? And I'll give you the funny. :)_**  
**__**Prisoner of Azkaban.**__** [Film quote.**_

Severus - Give me a reason. I beg you!

Remus - Don't be a fool.

Sirius - He can't help it. It's habit.

Remus - Be quiet.

Sirius - Be quiet yourself, Remus!

Severus - You two, quarrelling like an old married couple.

Sirius – Why don't you run along and play with _your chemistry set!_

Ahaa…found that entire part rather amusing myself.


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